「想い (承前) / 告白」 (Omoi (Shouzen) / Kokuhaku)
“Chapter 54 Feelings (Continued) / Chapter 55 Confession”

Strength of Conviction

Defeat used to sink Rei into a spiral of depression, making him mull about wondering why he even continues pursuing shogi, when it is something he holds little love towards. Now, losses rouse a stubborn fighting spirit of the likes we have never seen. Anger, passion, and determination. Kiriyama puts up a wide emotional spectrum, and it warms me to think about how this presents such a stark contrast, compared to when the series first began. With deep bonds forged from chance encounters, he finds a reason to fight his way through life, as opposed to despondently taking things as they come.

The patience and care exhibited by the Kawamoto sisters deserves much credit for facilitating this change. It is not surprise that they are the source of Rei’s newfound conviction. Previously, consider how Rei couldn’t even help himself. He regularly brushed off a concerned Hayashida-sensei, insisting that he was completely fine despite continuing to bottle his issues. However, when it concerns Hina, everything changes – Rei proactively seeks out assistance. Frankly, we’ve always had glimpses of Hayashida’s wisdom, but I feel it was particularly prominent within this episode. He gives level-headed advice, that does not advocate passively putting up or aggressively retaliating. Instead, Hayashida creates some insight as to what Hina might truly be feeling. If the methodology of a successful resolution is contrary to the victim’s wishes, it could end up causing more damage in the long-term. In the aftermath, there are usually undesired consequences that have to be dealt with.

On the other hand, Rei is already thinking ahead about how to solve the problem in his own awkward way. Wouldn’t you find it weird, if some random associate started covering your cost of living, private tuition, litigation expenses, etc? But you honestly cannot fault his intentions. He aims to stand true by his word – that he would do anything to protect Hina. To that end, Rei seems to have the impression that he needs to win all his games, so he can stockpile money for any potential eventuality. Much to my amusement, Nikaidou gets it totally wrong. Sorry buddy, your springtime of youth hasn’t quite arrived. That said, who wouldn’t get excited over seeing their friend make such a remarkable turnaround? While Rei is merely a fictitious character, that I don’t even know on a personal level, I’m still inclined to feel really happy for him.

Perspective Matters

In the past, on Takaii’s posts for the first season, I drew a comparison between Kyouko and Akari. Though people might consider me to be a committed apologist of Kyouko, I used it to highlight why her actions are ultimately unjustified. After all, Akari had a rough life, and was still able to rise above her own circumstance. So why can’t Kyouko? Then again, not all people are made equal. Trying to assess human morality through an objective criteria kind of misses the point, hence these kind of presumptions should be excluded.

Then we turn to analogies. If Kyouko Kouda is a broken wine glass that can’t stop leaking, then Akari Kawamoto is also a broken item of sorts. Only her cracks are poorly taped up, because she needed to stay strong for her younger sisters, immediately after the tragic death of their mother. The weight of a sudden and unexpected parenthood is no light ordeal. Not saying that there’s no joy in looking after Momo, but since she upheld a motherhood by proxy from an early stage, Akari wasn’t even able to properly enjoy her youth. We often think about her as a source of comfort, that can be relied upon in dark times. However, for someone carrying such heavy burdens at an untimely interval, there are understandably difficult feelings waiting to rear their head at the first opportunity. It seems obvious in hindsight, and that’s precisely what happens when she was faced with the unprecedented problem of bullying. Though Hina remains in a delicate position, her situation is much more bearable, with the love and support she continually receives. I’m just so glad that she was able to put on such a cheerful smile, following the events of last episode, since my heart could not have handled another consecutive episode of crying. Unfortunately, her problems are far from over, and we’ve got a long way to go before they even come close to being resolved.

Let me recount a personal experience. My parents called me pathetic and weak when they found out I was being picked on, and it got to the point where I just quietly allowed myself to get bullied, for fear of getting scolded. What I’m trying to say is that while Akari could have done better, her handling of the situation is still acceptable in my eyes. We naturally want the best for our loved ones, so I don’t blame her for wanting Hina to run away, even if it meant Chiho would have been worse off. Of course, that doesn’t mean Hina’s choice should have been directly questioned, but it was done so out of concern rather than intending to maliciously isolate. Furthermore, gramps was there to help cover any shortcomings, so both sisters will learn. But I’m really touched that Akari earnestly ponders over how she could have done better. I’m sure Akari must have been relieved, when Rei gave validation, allowing her to shed tears that were long overdue. And I just wanted to say, there’s absolutely no shame at all, because trying to support two younger sisters starting from the age of 19 is nothing short of incredible.

End Card

8 Comments

  1. Another good episode and very nice post Zaiden. I’m glad they didn’t rush with the topic and are doing this very slowly with many deeper insights of each character regarding the situation.

    He regularly brushed off a concerned Hayashida-sensei, insisting that he was completely fine despite continuing to bottle his issues.

    The first half was surprisingly very on point yet still funny. The whole scene at the teacher’s office and the conversation with Hayashida made a clear insight what bullying is doing with the people around them and the victim itself. Also at the end it got funnier with every second and I can’t tell if I’m ready to set sail with the HinaxRei ship yet, this may have been only a hint for now but I learned my lesson after honey&clover so I expect a lot more from now on, though I wish Akari would find someone first but I doubt that it would even be possible to find someone suitable for her. However it’s been somewhat really quiet since the beginning around the romance part of this show if there’s any besides the family bonds and the love for shogi.

    However, when it concerns Hina, everything changes

    Watching Rei getting so serious about the whole situation is really refreshing. I believe there’ll be a few incredible moments with him in the future, showing the distance he’s ready to go for Hina and her family.

    And I just wanted to say, there’s absolutely no shame at all, because trying to support two younger sisters starting from the age of 19 is nothing short of incredible.

    Yes, I agree with that for great many reasons, Hina is pretty much still a kid and Akari is doing such a wonderful job taking over her mother’s duties in her own way and raising both of her sisters, of course this is known since season 1 and may have been explained multiple times already, but still seeing these flashbacks with Akari at souch a young age with Momo in her arms and crying Hina on her knees…both of them not quite ready to perceive the whole extend of the situation around them, much like kids can’t. Hina’s growing little by little, though, and later there’re some moments where she’s starting to get a bit of a clue. I have like the biggest and most respect towards Akari for all that and that she’s willing to care for others so much. It’s so sad that she is trying to find the fault in herself when she’s actually really the last person on earth to blame. Makes me really emotiomal again.

    So why can’t Kyouko? Then again, not all people are made equal.

    We’re left to wonder if she could ever change by her own. I think the fact that Rei had so much impact on her as a kid and still do in some way, it could mean that other people in her life are able to make it clear for her that she was wrong and is still chosing the wrong decisions for herself and others. I have to say that I really like the comparison between Kyouko and Akari because I think that Kyouko doesn’t really know how to care for other people while Akari has done nothing else but supporting others. Which also means that Akari needs to learn to put herself first at some point because this is also very important.

    Love the endcard btw, and also this scene was hilarious! Grandpa sure said something to make him panic.

    kana-chan
    1. I can’t tell if I’m ready to set sail with the HinaxRei ship

      Sacrilege!!! Haha, I’m kidding. Would anyone else be in the contention, or do you think that both need to resolve their issues before proceeding? Or could it be that you have reservations over the age difference? Being caught up on the manga, and certain things, is why I’m wholeheartedly boarding this ship.

      I wish Akari would find someone first but I doubt that it would even be possible to find someone suitable for her

      Show Spoiler ▼

      I think that Kyouko doesn’t really know how to care for other people

      Not necessarily. Kyouko is actually shown to care for Gotou! Helping him out with shopping, and buying him all sorts of provisions. But for the most part, I largely agree with your statement. Even doing things for Gotou is driven by a selfish desire, and I would like to see her do some good, without necessarily wanting anything in return.

      Akari needs to learn to put herself first at some point

      Comparing Kyouko and Akari is actually not too hard. Both suffered hardships early on in life, but responded in extremely different ways, for better or worse. Anyway, Akari is fine the way she is. In hindsight, she picked up Rei like a stray and enjoys having him over, because she’s actually a rather lonely person outside of her family. We see that even Grandpa has a social group of old people, whereas Akari has no one (and I’m beginning to see why the aunt attempts to provide her an outlet).I reckon the next step would be to see her meet and engage with more characters who are closer to her age. After all, there’s a whole world out there beyond what we’re seeing with school kids at the moment.

      1. No, no! don’t worry Zaiden! It’s not about the age difference. I don’t really see a problem here since Rei is still in his second/third? year of high school (if you can call it that – I mean he’s mostly skipping classes to play shogi anyway) and Hina is probably going to enter high school soon, If I remember correctly this is her third and last year at middle school where she also has to suffer right now. And time is passing very solid in this show, besides I really do not think too much about it when it comes down to shipping fictional characters, I don’t like how some people tend to stress over this so much and start applying their own rules and what’s “right and “wrong”. To be completely honest it stresses me out and makes me tired thinking how much time is wasted when fighting over these things. So in my case I like to take it lightly and wholehearted.

        Would anyone else be in the contention

        Not quite. Of all male characters I like Nikaidou the most but I agree it has to be Rei. And this is only a guess but you probably thought that I went with Takahashi and Hina, but here again I have to say no. He’s seems nice though, but I think that Hina’s crush really was indeed just a crush and it’s probably already gone for now then Rei is taking over all the free space in Hina’s heart already – especially now that he declared to always stay by her side and support her.

        or do you think that both need to resolve their issues before proceeding?

        That’s what I thought too, but thinking about it again doesn’t really make sense to me, in fact I believe that if they both waited to be free of all existing problems they have and might face in the future whatever it may be, I’ll probably be a skeleton when that time comes!!

        Since the characters feel so real sometimes and get treated very carefully I may have just never really considered it. To me, Hina is surely someone who needs to be protected but at the same time I also believe that she is the one who protects others (She really did try to defend Chiho and herself as well). She is very strong and yet she cries a lot. When Rei describes her he really didn’t say anything wrong or left something out he really does know her. I do think they would indeed be a very sweet and strong couple and Hina already knows more about Rei than most people (even if she’s not aware at this point and Rei doesn’t talk much about it) but since Akari probably knows it all, my guess is that she would support them anyway….can’t speak for grandpa though!
        Maybe it needs more for me to get hyped over this with just the Teacher’s guessing game – I will wait and hope it will offer more! Since you already pretty much on it, it probably it’s going to be good.

        Something something latest manga arc.

        It’s already hard to avoid spoiler…but this really makes it double stressful not to just continue to read it! Argh! what should I do?? Tell me! So there is romance for Akari afterall! But if it’s in the recent chapter it’s probably still ongoing and she is not married yet am I right?

        I reckon the next step would be to see her meet and engage with more characters who are closer to her age. After all, there’s a whole world out there beyond what we’re seeing with school kids at the moment.

        That’s true. I really wish for more characters around the age of the late twenties and above. I know we already have like already two hands full but I need like 10 more just in case and for entertainment and the hardship they all suffer from shogi of course.

        Not necessarily. Kyouko is actually shown to care for Gotou!

        My apologies! I totally forgot about that. Besides the shopping she also went to take care of his clothes and such. Yeah that is indeed her caring for him. He sure does appreciate it, but is it really necessary for her to do that? I mean he probably could find some servant/maid service instead so I really do agree with you that Kyouko is doing this just for her selfish reasons to get closer to him.

        Also, the current Meijin is someone who interest me too. He had a bigger role in S2 at the beginning but it seems he vanished already, kinda a cliché but a very good one though.

        kana-chan
    1. I still think the weight of 22 episodes compared to 5 episodes gives the edge to S1 for me. It did establish much of what S2 is relying on. However, since I’m up to date with the manga, I know I’ll love S2 far more once it runs the full course.

      I just want to know if we’ll get to seeing a particular person show up in the final few episodes. Unlikely they will make it, but one can hope!

    2. I watched S1 half-heartedly as it aired. Every week, I felt lost. When S2 started, I planned to watch, but I didn’t. I spent my time trying other series first knowing that I can always come back to this show.

      It wasn’t until a few weeks ago when I friend gushed about the movie. She watched the first movie on the airplane in June when she flew to Japan and she told me how great the story is. I was really surprised that she took interest in the story because she previously mocked my interest in manga and anime. (She took it back now…) Anyways, she recently asked me if I knew where to see the second movie. Again, I was surprised. She actually followed up on something from the summer. I thought she would just forget about it.

      Knowing someone, who had no interest in anime, ask about the continuing story made me realize that I must have missed something. I watched the first movie and only then I realized the depth of the story. Then, I marathoned S1 and the story and characters all made sense to me. I wasn’t able to connect the events by watching the episodes one week apart, but watching them back-to-back helped a lot.

      Anyways… that’s my story on how I became to appreciate San Gatsu no Raion.

      Bakapooru
  2. Ehi Zaiden, I have a question for you: What do you think about Rei calling Hina “my lifesaver”?

    I mean, if I unnderstand it correctly, Rei just realized that there is someone he can emiotionally relate to but… I don’t know, the word “lifesaver” sounds a little exaggerated to me. I was wondering if I’m missing something or I interpreted it in a wrong way.

    youkai
  3. I feel that the past 3 episodes are a great depiction of how bullying happens, what happens if you try to help( or not), and how to deal with it after. I don’t think there’re a lot of anime that depict bullying as well as 3-gatsu, though Shaft played a big role in evoking the dark, suffocating atmosphere.

    Into the episode, the use of ‘confession’ feels refreshing since the image of the word in anime is always from romance perspective. Instead, we get this instropective confession from Akari, and validation of Akari from Rei. Just like how Akari watched over Hina for a long time, Rei watched over Akari for a relatively long time as well.

    Also maybe it’s because of Zaiden’s comparison, when Akari kind of forced Rei to stay, it reminded me of how Kyouko interacts with Rei, kind of unreasonable and selfish.

    @youkai
    Talking about the ‘lifesaver’ and as to why Rei referred to Hina like that (instead of say, the whole family), I think it’s because how Hina, with painful experience that he possibly can’t imagine, cornered by her friends, and ignored by her teacher, still able to say and believe that she Definitely Did The Right Thing, and doesn’t regret it. At all.

    I think this struck Rei like a lightning because (in my opinion) he has been pondering his decision to go after Shogi most of his life. Shogi is precious because it connects him to his father, but after that? Shogi tore his new family apart, not to mention the harsh life condition as we saw from his apartment, and the grueling pain from defeat and training in shogi itself.

    And maybe, just maybe, right after he heard what Hina said, he realized that what he choose, the path he walk is not wrong either. After all, despite it took some years, it gave him a new family, friends, all the things he should have in his life. Hence, he called Hina his ‘lifesaver.’

    raxar

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