Kageki Shoujo!! – 12

「きっと誰かが」 (Kitto Dareka ga)
“Surely Someone”

A LOOK INTO OUR FEARS

I have a severe case of clown phobia. I also don’t take the word phobia lightly, I honestly have panic attacks if I see a ‘traditional’ clown–thanks Stephen King for that one. And yes, I also don’t walk by street drains. For many years now I have dealt with pre-sleeping terrors because an irrational part of my brain is certain a clown will appear next to my bed, scare the shit out of me and then stab me to death (sponsored by AHS Freak Show). It all sounds very silly when it’s written down and even more so when I say it out loud to someone else, hell, even my rational brain goes windows error sound mode when I think about it. But the best piece of advice I ever got and that’s had a positive effect in my life was “don’t try not to think about it, and when you think about something else, don’t think about it because you don’t want to think about clowns, but because you like thinking about this other thing you’re thinking of.” You know when you’re doing a task and there’s one thing you absolutely don’t want to get wrong? And then you start focusing so much on not making that mistake you end up making it anyway? Your thoughts are suddenly taken over by your fear of doing the thing and the only thing you can think about is failing, and that becomes your focus rather than the task itself. It’s almost like an open invite.

That’s the kind of good advice Sawa gives Ayako before her turn to interpret Juliet. Instead of obsessing over inevitable failure (which is something we have no certainty of, so inevitable is only really a story she’s created in her head), Sawa tells Aya to act because she loves to do what she does. There’s a reason why all these girls got into Kouka, they all love theater, acting, singing and dancing. Objectively speaking, it’s simple advice, but simple can be often overlooked and underrated. When Aya believes the story “I’m defective (bad) because I’m not talented and there’s nothing special about me.” She finds herself experiencing high levels of anxiety, fear, sadness. Dark thoughts cross through her mind. She compares herself to others and she even goes out of her way to apologize for events that have not yet taken place. “Reality will never exceed my expectations. That’s just my life.” She says. “No one has ever called me cute before.” She continues… or wait, that’s not true. Kageki Shoujo!! takes us again on a voyage to the past and we learn Aya-chan was the actual object of Yano’s affections (how fast are we allowed to set sail to a ship?). Aya-chan manages to let go of her fears, reconnects with her passion and delivers a beautiful performance! 

AN UNEXPECTED DARKNESS

I suppose I was quite off the mark in assuming Kouzaburou held any romantic feelings toward Sarasa, and while it’s true he holds her in highest regard as an actress, he’s also been pulling some manipulative strings behind the curtains. I was shocked by the whole ‘relationship coercion/blackmail’ scene between him and Akiya. It was unexpected, very dramatic (I mean, Sarasa was listening to the whole exchange) and interesting. “He’s so smart, so charming, so handsome. A villain through and through.” Damn, I’m all for it. 

In the end Akiya never dropped the question, it was Sarasa who asked him to become her boyfriend. “I want to make sure Sarasa-san lives out her teenage years to the fullest.” Now that we’ve been given this little window of background, I wonder what are Sarasa’s real feelings for Akiya. I can’t deny her feelings of affection, admiration and fondness for him–her being extra excited to go on their date was rather cute. But as we’ve seen, she also feels jealousy, resentment and perhaps even rivalry? Maybe she decided to date him so she can figure out her own feelings? This entire reveal made me think Sarasa won’t be as black and white a character as I thought she would. I can’t wait to see her Tybalt and Phantom’s Romeo!

Full-length images: 36.